


You Said You’d Be Here

by SnowLuthor



Category: Supergirl, The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alex Danvers & Lena Luthor Friendship, Angst, Established Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, F/F, Fluff, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Lena Luthor Needs a Hug, Lena Luthor-centric, Lesbian Kara Danvers, Lesbian Lena Luthor, POV Lena Luthor, SuperCorp Sunday, Supercorp child, all the stuff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:27:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21815902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowLuthor/pseuds/SnowLuthor
Summary: Lena Luthor experiences the worst pain she has ever felt in her life, losing the love of it. But, she is forced to pick herself up after she discovers something that leaves her reeling.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 39
Kudos: 282





	1. Crisis...

Crisis… that damned crisis. It took everything from me, everything, the love of my life, my whole world, my wife. When the monitor came, claiming that Kara had to die in order for the multiverse to survive, I didn’t believe him. Of course I didn’t, she had always been able to find another way. Not this time. Not ever again. I don’t know how I’m supposed to go on, but as much as it hurts, I’m going to have to because something depends on me now. Me and only me. She was supposed to depend on both of us. How am I going to do this all alone?

-  
-

Lena stared out onto National City, with its gleaming lights and tall skyscrapers, as she gripped her stomach. It was a cold day in National City, but Lena was numb from the inside out, praying that what she had just found out wasn’t true. Although she knew it was. Kara and her had been trying. Kara wanted kids so bad and Lena would have done anything to give them to her. And she did, but it was too late. 

“Lena!” She heard a distant voice call from behind her. Everything sounded muffled, her tumultuous thoughts constantly ringing in her ears, drowning out all other sound. 

“Lena, oh my God, you’re freezing.” A warm arm wrapped around her waist and guided her inside and she was hit with a wave of warmth as her teeth began chattering. 

“A-Alex?” Lena whispered as Alex wrapped a blanket around her and settled her down on the stark white couch in her office. 

“What’s wrong?” Alex said, getting straight to the point. “You texted that there was an emergency.”

“I did?” Lena questioned, searching through her memories hoping to recall texting Alex. “I’m sorry.” 

Alex deflated at the unusual resignation in Lena’s voice and crouched down in front of her. “Come on, let’s go back to my apartment and get you warmed up.” 

Lena nodded, not even bothering to argue with Alex. She felt so defeated, so broken, she didn’t think she would ever be the same again. 

-  
-

When they reached Alex’s apartment, Alex handed her some sweats and told her to go take a shower.

Lena spent a lot longer than needed under the warm water mulling over her thoughts. When she finally emerged from the bathroom, feeling warmer if not any better, she found Alex sitting on the couch with two glasses of whiskey in front of her and froze. 

“Hey.” Alex murmured gesturing to the glass of whiskey.

“I can’t.” Lena whispered with wide eyes.

“What do you mean, you can’t? I’ve never seen you turn down a glass of-“

“I’m pregnant.” Lena blurted out, cutting Alex off. The two stared at each other in complete silence and the first tear fell from Lena’s eye, and then another, and then another. All the tears she had kept at bay for the past week came pouring out. 

As she was stifling sobs and profusely apologizing for breaking down in front of Alex, Alex lunged towards her and enveloped her in a hug. 

“Don’t you dare apologize for this, Lena Luthor, it’s okay to fall apart, you don’t have to be strong all the time. It’s going to be okay.” Alex stroked her hair as the two of them sank to the floor, Lena’s body racking with sobs. 

“I Don’t k-know h-how I’m g-going to d-do this a-alone.” Lena whimpered clutching Alex’s t-shirt.

“Oh honey, you’re not alone. I know it’s not the same, but we’re all going to be here for you. Me, Kelly, Brainy, Nia, J’onn, Sam, Ruby, we’re all your family and we will always be there for you, no matter what.” Sometimes it was easy to forget how young Lena still was. She had lived so much and endured so much more pain than anyone at her age should have to. She always had a confident air about her that came with being raised by the Luthors. She never let herself fall apart, and now Alex could see how truly broken her friend really was. 

The two of them stayed on the floor until Lena’s tears and sobs had subsided. Alex gently lifted her off the floor and told her to get in bed.

“No, Alex, I can’t.” Lena said raspily.

“Yes, you can. Now, get in bed.” 

Lena grumbled a little as she climbed into bed and slipped under the covers.

“You okay?” Alex asked.

“No,” Lena said slowly. “But, I’m going to have to be.” She sighed, turning her back to Alex.

“We’ll all have your back, no matter what.” Alex murmured, walking away. 

Lena laid there for a moment before she finally succumbed to the darkness. Her last thoughts were of Kara and the unborn baby growing inside her. This was not how it was supposed to be.


	2. Ruptured

Lena’s entire pregnancy was miserable. She had horrible morning sickness- which lasted all day so it couldn’t really constitute as morning sickness-, the baby grew incredibly fast and started kicking only two months into the pregnancy and it was cute at first, but as the months went by the kicks got harder, and stronger, and she cursed herself for deciding to have a baby with a Kryptonian.

Alex, God bless her, did everything she could to help, no matter the time of day, or night. Alex had insisted that Lena come over to her place after work every day so she could make sure Lena wasn’t overworking and undereating, per usual. Lena and Alex fought about this arrangement a handful of times. It always ended with a disgruntled “fine” from Lena and a satisfied looking Alex. Although, if Lena was being completely honest with herself, she didn’t know what she would have done without Alex throughout the whole thing. She missed Kara desperately, so much so that some days Alex had to drag her out of bed and make her eat, drink, and simply go through the motions of daily life. 

Lena was broken, that much she knew, but she also knew that she had to piece herself together somehow, for her child. She was going to have a daughter, who would look up to her for everything and love her wholeheartedly. She would be damned if she didn’t do the same. The thing she feared most in the world was becoming anything like her mother and subjecting her daughter to the same heartbreak and rejection she was forced to live with every day of her childhood. 

About five months into her pregnancy, Lena woke up to the baby kicking, like she did every morning, and groaned. She couldn’t even remember a time when she didn’t wake up to her daughter’s legs ramming into her abdomen and Lena wondered how she was going to be able to take four more months of this. 

After about thirty minutes of staring at the ceiling, waiting for the stabbing pains to subside, Lena awkwardly rolled out of bed. When she stood up, she almost doubled over in and had to catch herself on the bed as her vision blurred. She knew something was wrong, this had never happened before. Usually, the baby’s sharp kicks would stall and allow Lena enough time to get ready in the morning before they returned, but this pain was different. This pain spread through her stomach and around to her back and was worse than any pain she had ever felt. When she eventually garnered the strength to stand up, she felt something warm and sticky run down her legs. 

“Damn it.” She whispered, feeling the uncomfortable stickiness pool between her legs.

Lena knew she had to call Alex and walked the few, agonizing steps to her nightstand before she realized that she left her phone in the living room.

“No, no, no, no, no,” Lena mumbled, feeling the dizziness take over her body. As a last resort, she flipped open the watch Kara gave her all those years ago, which she never took off, and pressed the House of El symbol. She collapsed on the cold, hardwood floor and waited for the darkness to overtake her. But, before she completely succumbed, she felt strong arms wrap around her and a small smile graced her features as she plunged into the welcoming darkness. 

__________________________________

The first thing she heard when coming to was soft murmuring coming from right beside her. She could feel a gentle hand stroking her hair and she sighed slightly as her eyes fluttered open and she immediately regretted it. The lighting was harsh and bored into her sensitive eyes. 

“Hey, sweetie.” A soft voice whispered from beside her. The hand stroking her hair stopped as the bearer of the voice situated herself so Lena could see her.

“Eliza?” Lena croaked, wondering what she was doing there. Eliza reached over for a glass of water and placed a straw to Lena’s dry lips. Lena willingly drank as the cool water soothed her dry throat. When she was finished and Eliza placed the cup on the table beside her bed, Lena spoke. “What happened?” she whispered. 

Eliza sighed, “Well, you gave us all quite the scare that’s for sure.”

“Sorry,” Lena mumbled as she bowed her head down. When she did so, her eyes went wide as her head snapped up to meet Eliza’s concerned stare. “No.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Eliza hurriedly replied, seeing the panic in Lena’s eyes. “She’s okay, Lena, you had a beautiful, healthy baby girl.” 

“What?” Lena managed to breathe out. “No, it’s too early.”

Eliza chuckled, “Not for a half-Kryptonian baby. In all honesty, we should have had her out before she had the chance to rupture your uterus.”

“Yea that was painful.” Lena darkly chuckled back.

“You should have told me Lena,” Eliza said softly, trying to meet Lena’s averted gaze. 

“I know.” Lena choked. “I just- it would have made it too real.” 

“But it is real honey,” Eliza said as she resumed stroking her hair. “And that secret almost cost you your life.” 

Lena broke down then. “What am I going to do, Eliza?” Lena sobbed. Tears were streaming down her face as her chest heaved, the weight of the last five months weighing heavily on her. 

“Oh, sweetheart.” Eliza murmured, grasping Lena’s hand in her free one. “You’re going to raise your baby girl.”

“H-how I can’t d-do th-this a-alone.” Lena stuttered.

“You’re not going to be alone, honey. You’ll have Me, Alex, J’onn and the rest of the family that you built here.” Eliza soothed.

“The family that Kara built for me,” Lena mumbled through her tears. “I-I d-don’t want t-to do this w-without h-her.” Lena looked into Eliza’s eyes for the first time since she saw Eliza sitting at her bedside, pleading with her to do something, anything that would make all the hurt go away. All she saw was a pained expression and unshed tears which only made Lena feel more defeated. Eliza got up from her chair and wrapped Lena in her arms. Lena gripped Eliza’s soft sweater and sobbed until she had no more tears within her and the pain medicine that was being pumped into her veins threatened to pull her under. Eliza pulled back but kept herself within arms reach and kissed Lena on the forehead. 

“Get some rest sweetheart,” Eliza said in her motherly voice, usually only reserved for Alex and Kara, but had more than a few times been used on Lena since her and Kara had started dating. 

Lena simply nodded, sleep pulling at her eyelids until they were completely closed. Her last thoughts were of the strong arms that carried her through the air, saving her life, and her baby’s. Realistically, she knew it was probably superman but, as her consciousness slipped away, she allowed herself to imagine that it was Kara. Soon, she would burst through the door or the DEO med bay. "I’m right here baby, sorry I’m late", she would say and it would have felt like all the stars in the universe had just aligned. Lena would have been so happy. Would have been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are some loosely interpreted lyrics from Taylor Swift's "The Moment I Knew" in the last paragraph (which is where the title of the fic comes from). I just love that song so much.


	3. Baby Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena meets her baby for the first time.

The next week was a whirlwind for Lena. Alex woke her up every couple of hours to run tests and check her vitals, which put Lena in a foul mood. She was tired, irritable, and still constantly grieving, especially with all the hormones in her body running rampant. Lena had always prided herself on being able to control her emotions, but this was a whole other ball game. She cried all. the. time. and she absolutely despised it, so much so that when she cried, she got angry and then she cried even harder and on the cycle went. But, the first time she got to hold her daughter was a moment she would never forget.

The day after her little girl was born, Lena spent most of it in and out of consciousness because of the pain medication and general exhaustion. The morning of the next day, however, Alex walked in with a tiny bundle wrapped in a pink blanket and Lena teared up almost immediately. Alex gently unwrapped the sleeping baby and rested the baby on Lena’s chest since Lena wasn’t allowed to lift anything due to her surgery. 

“Oh my goodness,” Lena murmured. “She’s beautiful.”

“Yea she is,” Alex replied, clearly enamored with her niece.

Both of them simply stared at the baby for a few moments before Alex turned around to leave.

“Where are you going?” Lena nervously asked.

“Just outside so I can give you two a moment alone.” Alex’s eyes were filled with understanding. “It’s okay Lena, you’ll be okay.” 

Lena swallowed hard and nodded as Alex exited the room. She sighed softly as she looked back down and saw big blue eyes staring back up at her. 

Choking back a sob, Lena began to speak, “hello beautiful girl, I’m your mommy.” Lena smiled as a soft grunt escaped the baby’s tiny mouth. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to hold you on your birthday but, I know you were in very good hands. I trust your Aunt Alex with my life, and now your life as well. Honestly, I didn’t know how I was going to do this, I still don’t, but looking at you now I’m going to fight harder than ever for our little family. I know babies don’t usually develop their eye color for a few months, but I think you’re going to have your other mommy’s eyes.” Lena’s voice caught as she thought about Kara. “Your mommy was the one who convinced me to have you and I’m so glad she did. I really wish she could be here, she would have loved you more than anything in the whole world. I’m going to try my absolute hardest to love you enough for both of us, which is going to be hard because your mommy loved so big. But, even though it will feel like we’re alone sometimes, we’re not really. You’ll have your Aunt Alex, Grandma Eliza, Grandpa J’onn, Aunt Sam, Ruby and so many other people who already love you so much.” Lena chuckled slightly as she reached up to wipe a tear from her face, “I don’t normally cry this much, but you really jacked up my hormones.”

Lena looked back down at her little girl and found that she had fallen asleep once more and sighed. The baby squirmed a little at the disruption but quickly settled back down. Lena closed her eyes and simply listened to the soft breathing coming from her daughter until Alex walked back in. 

“Hey, everything okay in here?” 

“Everything’s just fine,” Lena replied trying not to jostle the baby too much. “She has Kara’s pout though, so I’m in trouble.”

Lena watched as a flicked of pain flashed across Alex’s eyes, “Yea you are.” She said, tone slightly devoid of the humor that was supposed to come with the statement. Alex walked over and sat on the edge of Lena’s bed. The two of them sat in comfortable silence for a while before Alex spoke once more. 

“Do you have a name?” Alex asked, looking at Lena.

Lena was dumbfounded, throughout this whole ordeal she hadn’t even considered the fact that she would have to name the baby. “Uh, no.” she finally said, “I always thought Kara would be the one to name our kid.”

“What, like, Potsticker?” Alex laughed. This was the first time Lena had seen true joy in Alex’s eyes since Kara had disappeared. 

“I would obviously have had some say.” Lena chuckled back. It was then that she remembered a conversation she and Kara had what seemed like an eternity ago.

_  
_

6 months ago

It was in the early hours of the morning, sunlight just barely peeking through the curtains. Kara was drawing lazy circles on Lena’s bare back as Lena nestled her head into Kara’s shoulder. 

“So, we’re really going to try for a baby?” Kara asked quietly, excitement clear in her voice.

“Yes, babe, we’re really going to try for a baby,” Lena mumbled sleepily, exhausted from the events of last night. 

Kara gasped, “What are we going to name her?” 

“You know we don’t really have to think about that right now,” Lena replied smiling in Kara’s shoulder. She loved how her wife still got so excited about the little things.

“I know but it’s fun! What would you want to name her?” Kara giddily questioned. 

“Honestly, I don’t know, I’ve never thought about it before.” 

“What,” Kara gasped dramatically, “Not even when you were a kid?”

“Babe, you know how I grew up, Luthors had no time to fantasize about future children. That particular past time was reserved for world domination. What about you?” Lena asked back trying to divert the attention from her childhood. Even though she had opened up to Kara about everything, she still didn’t like talking about it. 

“Well, of course, I’ve always loved the name Alura, after my mother, but there was always one name that I always wanted to name my daughter.”

“What?” Lena mumbled sleepily.

Kara told her the name and Lena opened her eyes and looked up at her wife. “It’s perfect,” She whispered as Kara stroked her hair and she drifted back off to sleep.

While she was sleeping she dreamed of the future the three of them would have and smiled as she relished in her happiness. 

-  
-  
Present Day

“Lena. Lena!” Alex called sounding slightly worried.

“She already chose the name,” Lena whispered, fearing her voice would betray her if she spoke any louder. 

“She did?” Alex asked, waiting with bated breath.

“Yea,” Lena replied, meeting Alex’s eyes.

“Well, what is it?” 

Lena looked down at her sleeping baby and kissed her on the top of her head, “Astra Elizabeth Luthor-Danvers.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always thought that Kara might name her baby after her aunt and I also wanted to do something a little different so... meet Astra!


	4. It’s Been Five Years

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Read the title...(hehe)

After Astra was born, life went on. Lena slowly recovered from her surgery which meant that she had to learn how to accept help from other people. Eliza stayed with Lena and Astra while Lena was recovering and Alex and Kelly came over almost every day. Eliza taught Lena how to cook, since it was discovered that she was pretty terrible and helped her navigate her way through being a mom. 

The day Eliza left, nearly two months after Astra was born, Lena had no idea what she was going to do. Just being a mother terrified her, let alone a single one. But, again, life went on. Lena grew significantly as a person as she fiercely protected a whole other life. Astra was a wonderful baby. She slept so well Lena had to wake her up for feedings and soon enough she was sleeping through the night. 

On Astra’s first birthday, their whole family came, Eliza, Alex, Sam, Ruby, Nia, Brainy, J’onn, James, and Kelly. Looking around the room Lena realized how far she’d come and how much she’d had to endure to get there, but there was still one thing missing.

After all this time, Lena still couldn’t shake the feeling that Kara would just walk through the door and smile and everything would be just fine. She still couldn’t imagine Astra growing up without her in her life. Somehow her daughter was already one and Kara should have been the one taking copious amounts of pictures while everyone groaned, even though they knew they would be thankful to have the memories to look back on. 

The only thing Lena could do was move forward. Her daughter was growing up, fast, and Lena would be damned if she missed out on her life because she was wallowing in grief, Kara would not have wanted that. Besides, Lena saw pieces of Kara in Astra, her big blue eyes and frustratingly adorable pout. Her smile and joy that would light up any room she burst into. To Lena, she was perfect and she always would be no matter what. 

_  
_

Five years later

“Little star come downstairs,” Lena called, “you’re going to be late for school.”

“Coming mommy!” Astra’s little voice floated from down the hall. 

Lena watched as dark curls came bouncing into the kitchen. “I’m ready!” the little voice said.

Lena took in her daughter’s appearance and chuckled, “Babe your shoes are on the wrong feet, again.” 

“That’s just how you perceive it.” Astra replied with a toothy grin.

“I see you learned a new word.” Lena said as she smiled down at her daughter, “aren’t your shoes uncomfortable?” 

“Nope.” The blue-eyed girl said, popping the p. 

“Ok then, let’s go.” Lena grabbed her purse and headed out the door of her apartment while simultaneously slipping on her heels. She shut the door behind her, made their way down the elevator and hopped inside Lena’s Jaguar SUV. They were driving down the busy streets of National City when Lena’s phone rang. 

“Morning, Alex.” Lena chirped as she turned down the Taylor Swift music that was on full blast.

“You need to get to the DEO right now.” Alex’s sharp voice cut through the car’s speaker and Lena could immediately tell something was wrong.

“Whoa, Whoa, hold on, little ears.” Lena switched the phone off the car’s speaker and balanced her phone between her ear and her shoulder. “Okay, what’s wrong.” 

“Just, get to the DEO as soon as you can, please.” Alex pleaded.

“Alright, I’m almost to Astra’s school, I’ll come straight there after I drop her off.”

“Uh, yeah, okay.” Alex mumbled and then abruptly hung up the phone.

“Alex?” Lena said has she heard the line go dead. Lena sighed and looked into the rearview mirror to find her daughter’s worried eyes staring back at her.

“You okay mommy?” Astra asked, eyebrows scrunching together adorably. 

“Yes, baby, I’m fine.” Lena smiled at her daughter, though the worry coiling tightly in her stomach made it difficult. She turned the music back up and listened to her daughter belt out the lyrics to “Shake It Off” as she mulled over her tumultuous thoughts, going over everything that could possibly be wrong.

____

About thirty minutes later, Lena rushed into the DEO. Alex stalked up to her almost immediately and grabbed Lena’s arm. 

“Alex, what the hell is going on?” Lena asked, frustrated that she had to take off work for this. Alex just lead her down hallway after hallway until they made it to the all too familiar medbay. “Alex! Just tell me wha-” Lena stopped dead in her tracks as she looked through the glass windows. “No.” 

“Lena-“ Alex started, but Lena cut her off.

“It’s not possible. There’s no way. I don’t understand.” Lena started to panic as she quickly turned from Alex and practically ran to the nearest bathroom.

“Lena!” Alex called as she raced after her. 

When Lena made it to the nearest bathroom, she promptly vomited. When she came out of the stall, she walked up to the sink and tried to still her shaking hands as she turned on the faucet. Letting the cool water fall over over her hands she stared into the mirror ahead of her.

“There’s no way, there’s no way.” She kept whispering to herself like a mantra until she felt pressure on her shoulder.

“Lena...” Alex started.

“What?” Lena snapped, roughly turning off the water. “What could you possibly say?” She ripped a paper towel out of the dispenser and angrily wiped at her hands as a million thoughts raced through her mind. It couldn’t be possible, it wasn’t possible. 

“What do you need me to do?” Alex murmured. 

“Just, give me a minute.” Lena whispered as she willed her voice not to break. She walked over to the trash can and threw her paper towel away which she’d been gripping so hard her knuckles had turned white. She slid down the cold tile of the wall until she reached the floor and Alex followed suit. The two of them sat there together in silence for a long time, until Lena cleared her throat. “Okay,” She rasped, “I’m ready.” 

Alex got up from the floor and reached out for Lena’s hand. Lena looked at it warily as she took the offered hand and made her own way up off the floor. She straightened out her black pantsuit and ruffled hair and stalked out of the bathroom. The click of her heels echoed in her ears the entire way down the hallway until she made it to the glass windows and time completely stopped. The figure was staring at her through the glass and Lena almost, almost, ran away again, but she needed answers. She had spent too long wondering what had happened, too long wishing there was some way to find answers, and now there it was, staring right at her. 

Lena walked slowly through the medbay doors and came face to face with someone she never thought she’d see again. 

“Hello sister,” The figure said. “It’s been awhile.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was definitely a fun one to write. Let me know what you think in the comments, I love hearing from you guys!


	5. Oh Brother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After five years you’d think things would get easier... they definitely do not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s another chapter! I’m really proud of this one (I wrote it in one day 😂) enjoy!

“How are you alive?” Lena ground out through gritted teeth.

“Oh come now, Lena, not even a hello for your dear brother?” Lex smirked.

“It’s been a long time since you’ve been my brother.” Lena snapped. 

“Right, I forgot, you miss the red curls.” Lex coolly replied.

“You didn’t answer my question, so I’ll ask it again, how are you alive?” Lena stared into eyes that mirrored her own, eyes she used to know so well. Everything was a competition between them, now, it was to see who would break first. 

Lex eventually sighed and clenched his fist, “Well, as you know, I joined the good guys in their crusade against the destruction of the worlds.” Lena rolled her eyes at that, “during the last battle we, the paragons, were all fighting against that hideous anti-monitor and it looked like we were going to lose. Until your Kryptonian showed up with the Book of Destiny. I watched as she used it to save this world and it slowly tore her apart, looked very painful. Turns out I didn’t have to do much to rid the earth of a Kryptonian, they do it just fine themselves.”

“You bastard!” Lena shouted as she rushed up to grab Lex’s neck, only to be stopped at the last second.

“Lena!” Alex yelled, “this is what he wants.” She whispered in her ear, “now, come on.” 

Alex led Lena out of the room quickly as Lena fished her car keys out of her suit pocket. 

“Um, can somebody pick Astra up from school please?” Lena asked with a faraway look in her eyes. 

“Lena…” Alex said softly.

“Please?” Lena said coldly.

“Okay.” Alex said simply, giving Lena a worried look. “Do you want her to stay the night?”

“No I’m just going to go home.” Lena said, deflating slightly, “I don’t want to be alone.” 

Alex gently placed her hand on Lena’s shoulder, “you’re never alone, Lena.” 

Lena simply nodded. It was silly, she was surrounded by family and friends, but a part of her would always feel lonely without Kara. Kara was the one who filled all the fissures in her heart and made her feel whole. While her heart had tried to repair itself over the last five years, it was simply with band-aids and now they had all lost their stick. Lena mindlessly drove back to her apartment and made her way back up the elevator, it seemed like ages ago that she was ushering her daughter out the door for school on a normal day. Nothing about this day was normal anymore. 

Once she made it to her apartment, she kicked off her heels and made a beeline for her bedroom. Lena stripped off her suit, finding it constricting as she struggled to breathe properly, and slipped on one of Kara’s old NCU sweatshirts. She climbed into bed and slipped under the silk sheets, Kara’s side still untouched, as it had been since the day she didn’t come home. 

Lena layed in bed and stared at the wall clutching Kara’s sweatshirt until she heard a knock at the door. She sighed deeply and pushed the covers back, climbing to her feet and shuffling towards the door. When she opened it, she was met with Alex, Kelly, and her daughter, who was wearing a widely goofy grin.

“Mommy!” Astra yelled as she launched herself into Lena’s arms.

“Hey little star.” Lena murmured into her daughter’s hair as she held her close.

Astra wiggles herself out of Lena’s arms and ran over to Kelly and Alex who had stepped inside and shut the door. “We have a surprise for you!” Astra exclaimed excitedly.

“Oh do you?” Lena said, looking up at Alex and Kelly, quirking an inquisitive eyebrow.

“Aunt Alex said you were feeling sad today so we wanted to do something to make you feel better!” Astra said pulling something out of a grocery sack. “We’re going to make you dinner and after we all get to have ice cream!” 

“Ice cream!” Lena said, trying to match her daughter’s enthusiasm. “I’m sure that will cheer me right up.” Astra gave Lena a toothy grin that mirrored Kara’s and she felt her heart squeeze a little.

“Hey little star, how about we go start dinner?” Kelly asked Astra who was still holding the Neapolitan ice cream carton in her hands.

“Sure! My hands are getting a little cold.” Astra stated as she bounded off toward the kitchen, Kelly following close behind taking the groceries with her. 

When they were left alone, Alex gave Lena a sad look and opened her mouth to speak, but Lena spoke first. 

“Can we talk after Astra goes to bed?” 

“Yea, of course.” Alex murmured, knowing Lena was telling her that she didn’t want Astra to see her break down. The two women stared at each other for a moment longer, having one of their unspoken conversations before Lena turned on her heel and walked toward the kitchen. Alex sighed as she followed Lena knowing they were both in for a long night. 

After dinner and ice cream, Kelly volunteered to put Astra to bed. Lena poured her and Alex generous amounts of whiskey into two tumblers and proceeded to sit on the couch, legs tucked beneath her. They both sipped at their whiskey until Alex spoke up.

“How are you?” She asked timidly.

Lena gave a dark chuckled as she took another sip of her drink. “Do you even have to ask that question?” 

“I suppose not.” Alex replied as they lapses into another silence. 

“Why him?” Lena whispered, ducking her head down as she sucked in a wavering breath. 

“I don’t know.” Alex said, gripping her tumbler tighter. 

“So many lives were lost that day, why is he the one that gets to live?” Lena choked. 

“The universe is the cruelest thing out there.” Alex ground out and Lena could tell that she was fighting tears herself.

“You’re telling me.” Lena scoffed, thinking back on the disaster that was her life. 

“It’s been five years, Lena.” 

“I know.” 

“Why hasn’t it gotten better?” Alex meekly asked, her voice breaking.

“I don’t know.” Lena replies hopelessly, downing the rest of her whiskey, relishing the burning in her throat as it went down. She went to go refill her glass as Alex gently stilled her, still not looking at her.

“Astra.” Was all Alex said.

“Right.” Lena mumbled, feeling the tears form in the back of her eyes. “You know I haven’t been able to drink myself into oblivion one time since that day?” Lena said her laughter devoid of any humor. 

Alex gave a noncommittal grunt as Lena continued on.

“It hurts so damn bad and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. She was my everything, my whole world, the mother of my child, my wife! How am I supposed to move on from that? She was the first person who saw me, really saw me, outside of my last name or that poor little orphan who was just a charity case, from the very beginning.” Lena didn’t try to stop the tears running down her cheeks, knowing it was impossible. “I wasted so much time with her Alex, we were both totally oblivious to our feelings for each other. Then she revealed her stupid identity to me and I so scared, that I- that I was going to lose her that I pushed her away!” At this point Lena was on her feet, gripping her drink glass with both hands watching her knuckles turn white as she clenched her jaw. “That fucking crisis!” Lena screamed as she launched the glass at the wall and watched with horrified satisfaction as it broke into a million pieces and fell to the floor.

“Mommy?” Lena heard a little voice speak from behind her. Lena froze. 

“Hey honey, how about I take you back up to bed?” Alex said softly.

“Aunt Kelly said I could come say goodnight to mommy.” Astra replied clutching her blanket to her chest. “Why did mommy break that? We’re not supposed to throw things.” 

“I know baby, mommy’s sorry.” Lena finally said walking over to her daughter and crouching down to her level.

“S’okay.” Astra mumbled.

“Come on little star, mommy will tuck you in.” Lena held out her hand and Astra placed her smaller on in it and they walked down the hall to Astra’s room. Astra climbed into her bed and Lena tucked her in looking down at her beautiful daughter with her bright blue eyes and dark curly hair. 

Astra reached up and cupped Lena’s face with her tiny hand. “Why have you been crying mommy? Are you still sad?” 

“Yea I’m still a little said baby.” Lena replied feeling her heart clench as Astra’s eyebrows scrunched together, just like Kara’s used to.

“Did the ice cream not make it all better?” Astra whimpered. 

“The ice cream certainly helped.” Lena chuckled, “ but not everything can be fixed with ice cream.” 

“Why not?” Astra questioned as her brow scrunched further. Lena reaches out to smooth out her brow and kissed her little girl’s forehead. 

“I don’t know little star.” Lena answered. “What I do know is that I love you, very much, and I will forever and ever.” 

“I love you too mommy.” Astra mumbled, her eyelids drooping closed, “forever and ever.” 

Lena kissed Astra’s forehead once more and walked across the room to turn on the nightlight. She turned to look at her daughter once more, who was already fast asleep and sighed as she turned out the light and cracked the door. 

Lena spent the night tossing and turning in bed, her dreams full of Kara and her blasted brother. Eventually, she gave up on sleep and stumbled into the kitchen to make some tea when she heard a shockingly familiar voice.

“Lena come find me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you can’t tell I love cliffhangers... sorry


	6. Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be completely honest, I kind of forgot about this fic. I’ll try to update it more often :)

Lena whipped her head around to find the source of the voice.

“Hello?” Lena called out as it echoed through the open apartment. 

“Lena,” the voice said once more, “come find me.” 

“Shit, I’m going insane.” Lena murmured, walking over to the fridge and grabbing a water bottle. Cracking open the lid, she downed half the bottle, wishing it was something stronger. Attempting to steady herself, she placed her hands on the cold island counter in the middle of the kitchen. 

After taking a few deep breaths and finishing her water, she turned to go back to bed. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw something glowing a pale, ominous blue. Stopping in her tracks, she slowly turned around and made her way towards the light, which was coming from her home office. Reaching the entryway, she pushed open the door and staggered backward as the harsh light burned her eyes. 

“Lena.” The voice was back, stronger this time. Lena dared not speak the name she wanted to call out so badly, the name that hadn’t left her mouth for five long years. Once she got her bearings, she shielded her eyes with her arm and walked further into the room. 

Her breath caught in her throat once her eyes adjusted to the light and she saw what-rather, who-was standing before her. It was Kara, her Kara, enveloped in some sort of blue aura. She looked absolutely beautiful -as always- and Lena’s heart constricted as she stared on. 

“Hey, beautiful.” Kara murmured, her face softening. 

Lena swallowed hard as her mind tried to grasp onto what was happening. After all these years, Kara was standing in front of her and forming words seemed to be the most difficult thing in the world at that very moment. 

“Look, I know this is crazy and I know this seems completely unreal because I’ve missed you like crazy, but I don’t have much time.” Kara had a panicked look in her eyes as if she could disappear any second.

Lena’s mind finally caught up with her and walking toward Kara she put her arm out only to have it fall through the blue light and back down to her side. “You’re not really here.” She said dejectedly. 

“Lena, you’ve got to listen to me. Lex he-” And then she was gone. 

“Kara? Kara!” Lena yelled into nothingness. Something wasn’t right. All of a sudden her office was gone and she was alone once more, screaming Kara’s name. “You can’t leave me again! Please, Kara!” 

“Lena, Lena.” A voice boomed out as she screamed into nothingness. 

Lena snapped open her eyes and shot up into a sitting position as she felt cold sweat drip down her forehead. “Kara!” She felt warm, strong arms wrap around her and hold her trembling form close. 

“Hey, it’s okay.” Came Alex’s gentle voice, which used to only be reserved for Kara. 

“No, no it’s not.” Lena breathed trying to slow her breathing by matching the rise and fall of Alex’s chest. “She’s alive.”

“Lena…” Alex sighed, preparing herself to convince Lena it was just a dream and to go back to bed. 

Lena wrenched herself from the brunette’s arms and forcefully flipped back the covers to scramble out of bed. “I’m not crazy Alex!” Lena all but screamed as she paced back and forth, trying to make sense of everything she had just seen.

“I wasn’t going to say that.” Alex murmured as she rubbed a tired hand over her face. 

“Yes, you were. You were going to tell me that it was just a dream and that I’m exhausted and I just need to go back to sleep. I know what I saw, Alex. I wouldn’t be saying this if I wasn’t sure, it was her. It was Kara and it was real.” At this point, she had stopped pacing and was looking at Alex’s shadowy form in the darkness of her bedroom. “We gave up on her.” Lena’s knees gave out from underneath her and she crumpled to the floor, holding her face in her hands as she sobbed. “We gave up on her, Alex. We should’ve known, we should’ve known.” 

Alex slowly climbed off the bed, knowing Lena was on the edge of delirium. She sat down on the floor next to her, like they did all those years ago on that horrible day, and placed her hand on Lena’s knee. 

“I’m s-so tired of crying.” Lena whimpered. “I-I th-thought it w-would get b-better, but all I feel is this all-consuming darkness threatening to pull me under and if it wasn’t for Astra, it would have.” 

Alex rubbed her thumb back and forth on Lena’s knee, clearly at a loss for words for which Lena was grateful. Not that she didn’t appreciate Alex’s encouraging words or inspiring pep talks, but they were getting old and repetitive. All Lena wanted to do was wallow in this pain that she had been forced to put away for her daughter’s sake and grasp at every last straw to maybe, possibly get the other half of her heart back. 

“What did you see in your dream?” Alex whispered, breaking the tense silence. 

“She was enveloped in some sort of blue light. I couldn’t touch her, but I could see her and talk to her, and then she-she disappeared.” 

“Did she say anything?” Alex prodded, keeping her voice even. 

Lena thought hard, she had been so stunned, “We- she didn’t have much time, something was pulling her away from me. She said-“ realization dawned on Lena’s face and she shot to her feet, heading towards the door.

“Lena, wait!” Alex yelled, gripping the brunette’s arm, effectively stopping her from leaving the room. 

“What, Alex?” Lena huffed, wrenching her arm out of the other woman’s grasp.

“You can’t just run off. If we’re going to do this, we need a plan and I need you to tell me what she said.” Alex led Lena back to the bed and the both sat down, Lena letting a large sigh and rubbing her eyes with the heels of her hands. 

“She said- she said Lex did something. I should have known, Alex, I should have known he was lying.” 

Alex wrapped her arm around Lena and guided the younger woman’s head to her shoulder. “There was no way you could have known, Lena, but now that we have this information, we can go from here.”

Lena nodded and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath, attempting to calm her erratic heart rate. She knew Alex was right but she still couldn’t help feeling guilty for once more missing her brother’s tells. Frankly, she was tired of him, tired of him always popping back into her life and making things worse than they already were and now, she needed him which didn’t sit well with her, but she would do anything to get Kara back- anything. 

Alex’s phone started ringing after a few moments of silence and Lena looked up at her, quirking a perfectly manicured eyebrow. The redhead took the call and blanched at what was being said through the phone.

Lena stood, her heart rate reaching speeds that were most definitely unhealthy. “What, what’s wrong?” She asked, panicked.

“It’s Lex, he’s gone.” Alex said, barely above a whisper as she gripped her phone, her knuckles turning white.

Dammit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think Lex did? Hope you enjoyed!


	7. The World Keeps on Spinning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another update! I have a plan for this story so hopefully this will be updated more often :)

Lena ran into her daughter’s room and expelled a sigh of relief when she saw her still sleeping in her bed, her dark, curly hair just barely peeking out from under the covers. Alex had followed her to the doorway and put a hand on her shoulder.

“I can get Kelly to watch her,” The older brunette said softly.

“No, no she needs to stay with me,” Lena breathed, still not taking her eyes off her daughter.

“Lena…” 

“Alex, I can’t leave her knowing my brother is on the loose. You have no idea how many times something or someone has gone missing just because I took my eyes off of it for a second because of him.” Lena walked over to the side of Astra’s bed and ran her hand over her little head. “Astra baby, wake up.”

“Mmm, is it morning?” Astra mumbled sleepily.

“No darling, you have to get up, mommy has to work.”

“Is aunt Kelly coming?” Astra’s blue eyes popped open as she stared at her mother expectantly.

“No, you get to come with mommy today, how does that sound?”

“Really?” Astra gasped, sitting up in her bed. 

“Yes, really,” Lena chuckled, picking up her daughter and carrying her to the kitchen. “Do you want a snack before we leave?”

“Yes please!” Astra beamed.

Lena glanced over at Alex- as she was grabbing some fruit snacks and animal crackers for her daughter to eat-who was leaning against the wall watching the exchange with adoration and a hint of nervousness.

“Alex, you can go on ahead, we’ll meet you there.”

“No, I’ll wait,” Alex replied, sitting down beside her niece. “How you doing, monkey?” Alex asked, tickling the young girl. 

“Aunt Alex, stooooppp!” Astra whined through her giggles. 

Lena watched the two interact and for the first time in a long time, she had hope. Even though her egomaniacal brother was on the loose and he was the only one with information about her wife, there was a chance that her wife was out there and Lena would be damned if she didn’t do everything in her power to get her back. 

“I’ve got to go make a phone call,” Lena announced suddenly, “will you be okay watching her for a second?”

Alex looked at her curiously and nodded, “Monkey and I will be just fine, won’t we monkey?”

Astra responded by imitating a monkey, making both women laugh and Lena turned on her heel, heading for her office. After shutting the door, she pulled her phone out of the back pocket of her jeans and took in a deep breath before hitting the contact on her screen.

“Lena?” A voice rang through the device.

“Hey, Caitlin, long time no talk,” Lena murmured, running her hand through her hair.

“How are you?” Caitlin asked softly.

“I’m okay. I’m sorry I never answered your calls or texts after- after everything.” 

“Lena, you don’t need to apologize, I understand. Although I would have loved to meet that little one of yours, she’s adorable,” Caitlin laughed lightly.

“What, how did you know about that?” 

“Lena, as much as you’d like to think you’re not constantly a spectacle in the public eye, you are and... I’ve also been getting updates from Alex every once in a while, I was worried about you.” Lena could practically see Caitlin biting her lip across the phone and smiled slightly, touched that her friend had been so concerned about her well-being. 

“I really am sorry about not calling, Cait.”

“Seriously, Lena, it’s okay, please stop apologizing. Now, what do you need my help with?”

“Excuse me?” Lena balked, her mind reeling at the sudden change of topic.

“Lena, don’t get me wrong, I would love to catch up, but I know you. It’s been five years, you called for a reason.” Caitlin stated matter-of-factly, ever the scientist. 

Lena turned a deep shade of red, thankful Caitlin couldn’t see her from the other side of the phone, “You’re right,” she conceded, “But I would rather talk about it in person. Would you mind if Astra and I came and visited you in Central City?” 

“Absolutely Lena, you are always welcome here. When were you thinking?”

Lena cleared her throat and rubbed at the back of her neck. “Um… tomorrow?” 

“So it’s urgent then,” Caitlin said seriously. 

“Yes, it is.” Lena sighed and sank down into her desk chair.

“Well, I guess we’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“Thank you, Cait,” Lena said earnestly, a small smile creeping onto her features.

“Anytime, Lee, really. And hey, whatever it is, it will be okay.” 

“I hope so,” Lena muttered, “Bye, Cait.”

“Bye, Lena.”

Lena hung up the phone and breathed out a sigh of relief. After Kara had disappeared, Lena had cut nearly everyone out of her life, except for Alex. She started to slowly let the superfriends back in because they were always around, but those who lived in different cities were something she could put behind her, they were mostly Kara’s friends anyway. She forgot how much she loved talking to Caitlin, being with Caitlin. They met while Lena was on a business trip to Central City and Kara had suggested the two of them meet up for lunch; the two scientists clicked instantly. After they met, the two would text and call constantly, to get opinions on each other’s work or simply to talk to someone who wasn’t their spouse, they also met for lunch as much as possible. Lena had missed Caitlin desperately after Kara’s disappearance, but her ties to Kara made things too painful, and then too much time had passed for Lena to reach out, according to her. Now, Lena was grateful to have her friend back and that no matter what, they would always have each other’s backs, she had a feeling she would need that in the near future more than ever. 

A knock at the door pulled Lena out of her thoughts and a sheepish looking Alex poked her head in.

“Everything okay?” The older woman asked.

“Yea, Astra and I are going to Central City tomorrow,” Lena told her, moving her swivel chair back and forth. “We’ll be staying for a week or two.”

“Oh,” Alex exclaimed, her eyes widening, stepping farther into the room. 

“Is… that alright?” Lena quirked a dark eyebrow in Alex’s direction. 

“Yea, yea, of course, it’s alright, it’s just… I’ll miss you guys,” Alex looked down at the floor, her cheeks dusting with red. 

Lena stood up from her chair, letting out a soft sigh, wrapping her arms around the brunette and holding on tight, trying to convey all the love and thankfulness she had for this woman. When Lena pulled back, she placed her hands on Alex’s shoulders and looked her straight in the eyes.

“We’ll be okay, because of you, we’ll be okay.” 

Alex gave Lena a watery smile and brought her into another hug, “I know you will, you always are, I’ll just miss you guys. Crazy to think after five years we’ve hardly spent more than a few days apart and even then I had Astra because you were on business.” 

Lena sniffled, “look at us, acting as though I’m moving across the world and not just leaving town for a week or so.” 

“We’ve gone soft,” Alex huffed.

“Yea, we have,” Lena chuckled, pulling out of Alex’s strong arms once more and wiping at her eyes, “thank you, Alex, for everything.”

“You never have to thank me, it’s what sisters do.” Alex shrugged and looked adoringly at Lena, “I’m proud of you.” 

Lena rolled her eyes, trying to keep the tears away, “alright, alright, enough of that, we should get going.”

“Munchkin is already dressed and revving to go,” Alex chuckled, imitating starting a car.

Lena laughed as they walked out of the room which immediately died out when she saw the sight before her. 

Lex was only floor playing with Astra who was giggling as something he said. Her brother’s eyes turned to meet hers and they glimmered with something she knew all too well, victory.

“Mommy!” Astra exclaimed, “I have a new friend!” 

“Hello sister, good to see you again.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope this story is still enjoyable ❤️


	8. Missin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh... Lex is back? He never goes away.

“Lex, what are you doing here?” Alex demanded sharply, placing her hand on the hidden gun at her side. 

“Agent Danvers, we meet again.” Lex straightened his immaculate blazer before turning his attention back to Lena, “At a loss for words, are we, sis?” 

“Get out,” Lena snarled, her eyes flitting to Astra who looked confused as to why her mother was acting this way. 

“Now now, Lena, where are your manners? I thought father and mother taught you better than that. I just came to talk.” 

“Astra baby, come here,” Lena said slowly, trying not to scare her daughter any further.

Astra ran over to Lena who immediately scooped her up in her arms and held on for dear life. 

“What do you want?” Alex hissed, her hand gripping the gun on her side tighter with each passing second. 

“Now see, that’s the thing, you need something from me and I want you off of my trail so, how about we make a deal?” Lex walked over to the kitchen and pulled some whiskey out of the liquor cabinet, finding a glass and pouring some of the brown liquid into it. 

“I’m not interested in making any sort of deal with you,” Lena said, still holding onto Astra who had buried her face into Lena’s neck. 

“Not even when it has to do with your beloved Kara?” Lex smiled and sipped at his drink, leaning onto the island counter as if he had all the time in the world. 

“Alex, go take Astra to the other room so I can speak to my brother,” Lena said sharply, handing Astra over to Alex.

“Lena-” Alex started.

“Please, Alex,” The younger Luthor pleaded.

Alex nodded and gave Lex one last glare before walking past the kitchen and into Astra’s bedroom. 

“So, she’s not dead,” Lena said once Alex and Astra had disappeared. 

Lex poured another glass of whiskey and handed it to his sister, moving to sit on the couch and patting the seat next to him. 

Lena paused for a moment and then walked over to the couch, stiffly sitting down, making sure to leave plenty of room between her and her brother. 

“Not exactly,” Lex smirked, “I’d say she’s more… trapped.” 

“Trapped where?” 

“Ah, ah, ah, little sister, you know better than anyone how this works. One does not simply lay all of their cards on the table, especially a Luthor.” 

Lena hummed noncommittally and sipped at her drink, “Well then, what do you want?” 

“Well, in a perfect world, I would have you on my side and you wouldn’t be helplessly in love with an alien, but then again, you have always been a disappointment.” 

Lena hated how her heart clenched at her brother’s words. The young girl inside of her that always yearned for her big brother’s approval, who was hopelessly naive and innocent, wanted to join her brother and prove to him that she could be good enough, but she knew better by now and so, she scoffed thinking about how she would never make Astra feel not good enough, not even for a second. 

“I’ve tried that before, didn’t really work out for me.” 

Lex rolled his eyes and finished off his drink, slamming the glass down on the coffee table in front of him.

“You’re really testing my patience here, Lena.”

“Oh,  _ I’m  _ testing  _ your  _ patience,” Lena replied exasperatedly. “You were the one who broke into  _ my  _ home, made yourself comfortable, and are withholding information about my wife. I’m sure it’s just all a means to an end for you, but this is  _ my  _ life and my little girl has had to grow up without her mother for five years. So I can assure you, your patience isn’t the only one that’s being tested.” 

Lex lurched forward and grabbed Lena by the throat, pinning her to the couch. “Listen here, little sis. I hold all the power. You will never escape me and you will never get your wife back, not as long as I am alive.”

Lena couldn’t breathe and she was starting to panic when she heard two gunshots go off and her brother’s limp body fell on top of her. The grip on her throat loosened and she gasped for breath, frozen in shock. 

Alex rushed over and pulled the body off of Lena, immediately checking her over for injuries. “Lena, Lena can you hear me?”

Lena swallowed hard and sat up, her head spinning as she did so. “Yea,” she rasped, pushing Alex’s hands away. “I’m fine.” The brunette stood and swayed slightly, Alex’s hands reaching out to catch her.

“Lena…”

“Alex, I’m fine. I just need to get to Astra.” Lena took a couple steps forward and noticed whimpering coming from the corner of the living room. Lena practically ran towards the sound and scooped her frightened daughter up in her arms. The little girl clung to Lena with all her might and Lena did the same. “It’s okay little star, mommy’s got you.” Lena whispered over and over again. 

After a few minutes of comforting her daughter, the dizziness returned full force and Alex rushed over to let Lena lean against her. 

“We need to get you to the DEO and get you checked out,” Alex murmured, gently prying Astra from Lena’s arms. 

Lena sighed and nodded her head, which only increased the spinning in her head. “Fine, but take me to S.T.A.R. Labs.” 

“Lena, we really shou-”

“I’ll be fine, just call Caitlin and tell her we’re coming a little earlier than expected.” Lena cut in tiredly. 

“Okay.”

Alex settled Lena and Astra in an armchair, quickly calling Caitlin and the DEO to take care of Lex’s body. She then loaded the two up in her car and began the trip to Central City, keeping an eye on Lena the whole time, Astra having fallen asleep the moment she was strapped into her car seat. 

After about an hour on the road, Lena finally spoke up, “Is he really dead?”

Alex tightened her grip on the steering wheel, “yea, yea he is.” 

“He was our only clue, Alex.”

“I know.”

“What are we going to do?” Lena whispered, her voice cracking. 

“We’re going to find her, Lena. If she’s out there, we’re going to find her. We don’t need him, we never did.” Alex reassured her.

“I did, once,” Lena murmured, her eyes staring out the window. 

“Hmm?” The agent questioned, eyeing Lena wearily.

“I needed him.”

The two sat in silence for the rest of the drive, Lena doing her best not to fall asleep. Her throat was sore and it was difficult to breathe. The pull of sleep was enticing, with the lull of the car and the silence that enveloped it, but she knew better. She just had to make it to Caitlin. 

Once they arrived, Alex got Astra out of her car seat and held her in one arm while also helping Lena out of the car. When they walked through the doors, Caitlin immediately ran up to them and helped guide Lena to the medbay.

“What happened?” Caitlin said urgently as she helped Lena lie down. 

“Her brother,” Alex replied.

“Lex Luthor?” Caitlin remarked. “Isn’t he supposed to be dead?” 

“He is now.”

Caitlin paused for a moment, “So he didn’t-” She took in a sharp breath, “He didn’t have any answers?” 

“He did, but he attacked Lena before we got the chance to question him.” Alex squeezed Astra a little tighter as she watched the doctor continue to work.

“Oh,” Caitlin said in barely a whisper.

“Caitlin, I’m sorry,” Alex murmured.

“Uh, I can finish up here. The bunkrooms are just down the hall and I’m sure the little one needs some proper rest, it’s been a long night.” 

Alex nodded and took Astra out of the room, finding her way to the bunkroom and laid the little girl down on one of the cots, and gently tucked her in. She kissed Astra on the forehead and headed back to where Lena and Caitlin were. 

Lena was out cold, laying on the bed in medbay, she almost looked peaceful; save for the furrowed eyebrows that seemed to always be present when she slept. Caitlin turned around and gave Alex a soft look, walking the few steps in her direction.

“She’s going to be okay. I gave her a little something extra to sleep, she’s exhausted.”

“Yea, I don’t think she’s slept in five years.” Alex chuckled darkly, averting her gaze to the floor. 

“I can understand that,” Caitlin sighed, a weary resignation to her tone. 

The two stood in heavy silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Caitlin eventually cleared her throat and walked over to put a hand on Alex’s shoulder. “If they’re out there, we’ll find them.”

Alex swallowed hard and nodded. 

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go home and relieve the babysitter.”

Alex nodded once more and Caitlin walked out the door. The brunette, left alone in the quiet lab, sat beside her sister-in-law’s bedside and brought her pale hand in hers. 

“We’re going to bring her back.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I hope you enjoyed! Comments and constructive criticism are welcomed and appreciated. This chapter is kind of a filler and I didn't have a ton of motivation but I hope it turned out alright.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m trying out a series! I know this chapter is short but I’m just getting the story rolling ;) hope you enjoyed!


End file.
